Alabama's 2017 Scumbag of the Year is ...
Posted December 30, 2017 at 09:02 AM | Updated December 30, 2017 at 09:01 AM
By Kyle Whitmire
I have a New Year resolution for 2018. I want to be a bit nicer. I want to look at the silver linings, and not just the supercells headed for the trailer parks. I want to eat my eggs sunny side up, and not worry so much about food poisoning. I want to leave as much bitterness and snark behind me when the clock strikes twelve on Dec. 31.
All that being said, we still have some 2017 left to burn.
Smoke that carton of cigarettes. Binge on some crap “food” you bought from the corner gas station. Stare at your phone as much as you like. Because there’s nothing positive past this point.
It’s time to name Alabama’s 2017 Scumbag of the Year.
To give you some sense of just how nasty a year this has been, consider this. A year ago, if Robert Bentley wanted, he could have ordered the National Guard to shoot somebody. Now, he’s giving away something called CoolSculpting as a promotion for his Tuscaloosa dermatology practice.
Bentley carried on an affair with his senior political advisor, covered it up using state resources, was an unforgivable jerk to Dianne Bentley — until state lawmakers said enough. He was forced from office under the threat of impeachment. He pleaded guilty to a couple of misdemeanors, and packed his crap up and left town.
And he almost didn’t make this year’s list. That’s the kind of year we had.
Morgan County Sheriff Ana Franklin made headlines this year, but few of them good.
Money she’s raised for nonprofits can’t be accounted for. She used $150,000 from her prisoner food fund to invest in a now-failed get-rich-quick scheme involving title pawns, used car lots and a felon convicted of bank fraud. And her office appears to have hired the grandson of an unfriendly blogger to install spyware on that blogger’s computer — all without a warrant.