A sheriff goes to heaven (hey, it could happen. Our God is a merciful God) and joins all the people in that day's intake. First, comes a welcome to heaven speech by one of the senior angels, then to the supply room to be issued a gown, halo, wings, and a harp, then the quarters assignment, and a brochure explaining the rules. There are a lot of them.
The sheriff is pulled aside by Gabriel himself and is taken to a huge warehouse. The door opens and the sheriff sees a huge array of safety and police equipment: Crown Vics, Chargers, protective armor, multi-channel radios, dash cams, body cams, everything a sheriff could desire. On one side of the warehouse is a long table covered with paperwork. On examination, the sheriff finds approved state and federal grants, funding drug task forces, school resource officers, secure communications, crime predictive software, 100% connectivity among the all-new computers, and on and on..
The sheriff says: Wow! What is all this stuff?
And Gabriel answers: These are all the things you never asked for.